Winter Blues??

Ok Seriously..... who in their RIGHT MiNd would ever choose to MoVe to Vernal??? The sun has not been here in TWO WEEKS and I am HoMiCiDaL, SuIcIdAl and DANGEROUS!!! This inversion really plays on everyone out here, everyone I know is depressed and moody and its killing me. I am usually an upbeat happy person but I want to tell everyone where to go and how they should get there! On top of that life has brought so many challenges lately. Like right now for instance, I have been up since 0500 and have to be up the same time tomorrow but I dont even want to go to bed because I know I will just lay there and think of all the things I should be doing..... aka: homework, laundry, cleaning the house. Stupid!!!
School is going great, super busy. I love all of my instructors except one... and she just happens to be on my bad side and vice versa. I cant catch a breath when she is around... and its making me crazy. Being soft spoken is NOT one of my finer virtues, and I just have to think in my head "Let it go.... Let it go...." I am about ready to blow people! My clinicals have been AWESOME! There are seriously so many great nurses out here that are willing to show me anything I want to see, I have got to do things that I will most likely never get to do again!
My adorable kids are really taking the blunt end of me being a beast lately. Poor Brynlee was begging me all night to just help her practice the piano and I just kept putting her off and putting her off until it was time for bed. I really hate being like that... its not their fault that I am overloaded and a crazy physcopath right now.... so why am I like that? Caeden has had pink eye this week... that is so not fun, I have to SIT on him to get drops in his eyes... when I become a professor I seriously am going to invent another treatment other than drops for pink eye. They are both doing good in school, Caeden has really stuggled with me going back to school. I am off on Mondays and take him to preschool and its a crying disaster every time because he doesnt want to leave his mommy. :( Sad I know.... I feel horrible.
Please pray for eveyone in Haiti! When I start feeling sorry for myself I think of people like that, or like my neighbors down the street who we have been giving food too because they have none, it really makes me grateful for what I do have. Life is so tough on everyone right now, everyone's challenges are alike and different in the same breath. Help your neighbors and those of you living in Vernal right now reading this...... lets get a possy together and go tanning!!!! Fake sun baby- a girl's gotta do what a girls gotta do!!!

What I am grateful for

December 09

I hope everyone's Christmas was as nice as ours! We had a lot of fun this year, did a few new things to help with the Christmas spirit and remember what it truly is about and not just getting presents. We gave a box of food to one of our neighbors that dont have anything and the church is helping them out- the look on their faces when we showed up with that food made Christmas! The kids of course had a great time, we drove around listening to music on Christmas Eve looking at everyones lights and saw THE leg lamp off of 'A Christmas Story' sitting in someone's front window!! Made my night- it was HILARIOUS!!! Brynlee really wanted Santa to bring her a Little Pet Shop (which she has played with maybe twice) and a snowboard (as you can see we got a sleigh instead). Caeden wanted the usual trucks and whatnot, he got a big train (I am not sure what Santa was thinking because its one that he cant really take off the track and drive around like a crazy man). Both of them got Leapster 2's because Santa is SICK & TIRED of hearing them fight over Brynlee's Nintendo DS.
My Dad came out for breakfast and that was SO NICE to have him here, tried to convince him to spend Christmas Eve but wasnt too sucessful there. But it was great having him here and the kids absolutely LOVE it when he comes! Caeden is his little buddy for sure!
As you read my previous post the day after Christmas started something I never thought I would endure. Things are in some ways a little easier, but are harder in a lot of ways. I still make sure that I see or call Tracy several times a day, I cant imagine her lonliness, and also the kids. Things wont get easier for them for a long time if ever. Please remember them in your prayers.... that they may feel some comfort.